Newswise — Since my brother Chris was deployed last semester, I've learned much about being part of a military family. Most significantly, I've grown to understand that the war is always with you. You're always aware, as the military says, that you have skin in the game.
Simply put—it's consuming. I find myself watching the news with such urgency or repeatedly looking over Chris' consistently benign e-mails. There's just this hope that by being diligent, I'll hit upon some small reassurance that he'll be okay and come home whole. But, sadly, this search only yields an overwhelming sense of helplessness, a loss of agency that I suspect many loved ones back home share. Regardless of political ideologies, feelings about the war or direct links to deployed military members, it seems that people would like, in a real, tangible way, to "support the troops." The problem is how?
For me, this answer came in an unexpected fashion. I kept hearing about fatal or life-altering head wounds. Something like 59 percent of troops surviving an improvised explosive device (IED) attack suffer traumatic brain injury, most commonly from the enormous concussive effects of the blast. Fortunately, before Chris left, I also heard Dr. Bob Meaders (Captain, U.S. Navy, Ret.) speak about a retrofit for helmets that can drastically reduce these numbers.
This is a battle of bombs, not bullets; therefore, for me, there was no way my brother was deploying without one. Immediately, I e-mailed Dr. Meaders, and he shipped a helmet insert to my brother that day. Chris confirmed that he received it, thanked me—commenting on the increased comfort level of the helmet—and that was it.
I didn't think much about it until a few months later when I was talking with my father. He asked me in an unusually quiet, still voice whether I thought Chris was using the insert. His angst in anticipating my answer had actually robbed him of normal inflection.
Then it struck me. Certainly, this $70 helmet retrofit was helping more than Chris get through the deployment.
In retrospect, that discovery seems so odd. Of course I realized my parents appreciated and were thankful for the upgrade. I knew that. But I had not internalized the depth of their feelings, nor did I understand that in their minds, knowing Chris had this piece of equipment somehow tipped the scale in favor of his safe return—that now, along with his good judgment and strong training, he had one more thing going for him. At that point, I decided to find a way to help give this same much-needed hope to the parents of Chris' 35 men. Their children, too, needed this safeguard.
So, the fund-raising began, starting with a series of mass e-mails that explained how Captain Meaders is working to provide all military deployed (Iraq and Afghanistan) the inserts for free, but that takes fund-raising. Consequently, there's a backlog (more requests than money). The inserts cost $70, not an insurmountable sum. What I'm asking every American to do is visit www.operationhelmet.org. Capt. Meaders has material about the actual product, the military's approved use, tax information, etc. He is a compelling human being.
I solicited everyone that my parents and I knew. I contacted my parents' friends and their friends. I wrote letters to editors and called representatives. Casual remarks of interest were always followed with a presumptive, "Make the check out to Operation Helmet" or "I'll be glad to come back after payday." And it worked! People were generous, both in their personal contributions and in passing along the word. When we got close to the target amount, Dr. Meaders mailed Chris 35 inserts to a location in a far-away desert.
And then came my brother's reply: We just got the inserts late last night in the mail. But when I got my platoon together and I explained the whole thing to them from Dr. Meador (that was his name right?) being a passionate advocate of these things, and then how you heard about them and wanted to make sure every marine in my platoon had them and then all the benefits they provide (from concussions to stopping bullets from bouncing around inside the helmet), the marines were in a kind of shock that someone they didn't know would go so far out of their way to provide something for them.
They knew they weren't cheap, and they started doing the math in their heads and figuring the numbers out. They were totally amazed. They were so thankful. Marines are wonderful, in that they will always do what they are told, and they will do it, tired, hungry, sleepy, moody, wet, miserable, in pain, and everything else. Marines are born to fight and get the mission done with less and do whatever it takes to make sure it happens with the proper outcome. So when they found out you were out there running around raising money for them to get inserts they could have gone without "¦ you should have seen how thankful they were. It was truly awesome, and in a way that cookies and magazines and candy (though appreciated) will never be because those things will not actually go out and help them accomplish their mission. You and your efforts made it that much easier for 35 marines.
Ree, you are truly awesome and should be proud of this. You made 35 (36 including me) grunt marines extremely happy, and we each owe it to you and those who helped you and those who do similar kind things to keep going.
As you can see, with the help of many giving friends and strangers, this is how I have been spending my summer, trying to put the war at the forefront of our minds again. This is a difficult challenge as the timeframe seems to stretch. But the people over there, on the ground, in the heat, away from their loved ones, are all our brothers, sisters and children. We all have skin in the game.
If you too would like to order a helmet retrofit for a family member or friend, visit Meaders's Web site, www.operation-helmet.org. Donations to the troops in general are welcomed, and remember your gift doesn't have to be grand. Every single dollar helps. At the site, you can view Meaders's recent interview on Lou Dobbs Tonight, which provides a succinct description of the program.
You can also talk to me. I know this may seem a bit strange, privately having to equip the military, but that's the reality of this war. Again, I am asking that we put politics aside in this case and simply support the troops.
Dr. Hilary Stallings is Manager, Recruitment and Resources for the College of Liberal Arts, at Middle Tennessee State University in Murfreesboro, Tenn. Her brother, 2nd Lt. Chris Frey, is serving with the U.S. Marines in the Middle East.
RSS